Female ejaculation – and we’re not taking the piss…

This, to those experienced in this mystical action and those woefully inexperienced, is considered the height of womanly pleasure. And please please please, should this have happened to you, don’t you dare feel embarrassed. There are a lot of us who are dreadfully jealous of you lucky bitches…

Women produce quite large quantities of body fluids during sex, especially in a highly aroused state over an extended period.

The Female Prostate

The female prostate, together with the urethra (the tube which connects the bladder to the outside of the body) and vagina are actually part of a solid structure. Reinier De Graaf was the first person to describe the female prostate in Western medicine in 1672. He described it as a collection of functional glands and ducts surrounding the female urethra. According to him the glands produced pituitoserous juice, which basically means a thick mucous that is pale yellow or transparent.

The female prostate actually lies within the wall, along the length of the urethra. It is actually part of the urethral wall, which in turn is contained within the vaginal wall. It is a relatively small organ about the size of a woman’s thumb.

So what is the purpose of the female prostate?

Little is known about the actual function of the female prostate and the role it plays in our body. It is currently considered to have two main functions. The first is to produce and store prostatic fluids and the second is to release hormones into the blood stream.

What do we ejaculate?

Female ejaculate is a fluid that is expelled through the urethra during sex. When released in smaller quantities it may be a clear, milky or somewhat yellowish mucous-like fluid. As the amount ejaculated increases, the fluid becomes more like clear water. In small quantities it may be concentrated with a distinct musky smell, but in increased amounts there is less to no scent.

Ejaculated fluid is not urine, even though they might share some substances.

Women who ejaculate have reported that the colour, smell and even the taste of the fluid vary from event to event. It is perfectly safe to taste ejaculate (be it your own or that of your partner), but should not be done when practicing safe sex. Some women also report that their menstrual cycle influences the consistency of the fluid ejaculated, as will what you eat and drink. Some women report it is sometimes clear and odourless and other times thick and pungent.

Who ejaculates?

All women produce ejaculate even if they are not aware of it. The fluid may seep out and mix unnoticed with other body fluids rather than being a distinctive gush of liquid during sexual activity. The prostate probably contributes regularly to the moisture present at the vulva.

How Much Liquid Is Ejaculated?

The quantity of the liquid can vary from women to women. While some report a few drops others lay claim to as much as two cups.

What is the G-Spot?

The G-Spot is said to be an area, highly sensitised, within the female prostate or located further back along the urethra.

A woman who is not sexually aroused may not have a prominent or visible G-Spot. When that same woman is highly aroused and her prostate swollen, she might have an extremely distinct G-Spot.

Do not forget clitoral stimulation!

For many women the clitoris may hold the key to female ejaculation. Most women find it hard to become highly aroused without clitoral stimulation. If a woman is not heavily aroused her prostate may not fill with the necessary increased amounts of fluid. If her prostate is not swollen her G-Spot may not be accessible. Therefore, should there not be the necessary clitoral stimulation to arouse the G-Spot, there can be no ejaculation.

How do you stimulate the prostate?

The best tool to use are your fingers. They are firm, flexible and sensitive. Should you however wish to explore, there is no reason why a dildo (especially those specifically created for G-spot stimulation) should not happily be pulled into the play. Knowing your own body is key and it helps to know where your own erogenous zones are in order to guide your partner to the correct spots.

Can you learn to ejaculate?

Of course! Try to empty your bladder first, as you might develop a feeling similar to wanting to go to the bathroom. Ejaculation may in some women not occur without the prostate or urethra being stimulated. If you are self-servicing, it might be necessary to use a dildo to stimulate your urethra. As you massage the clitoris, stimulate your urethra by massaging the top of the vagina by using only light pressure at first. Massage the full length of your urethra, from the opening back into your vagina. Keep up the clitoral massage. Try different pressures and strokes, what works for one person may not be exactly what another needs. You might feel the urge to let your bladder go. Do not fight the urge, go with the flow, literally. Relax and breathe deeply. And enjoy!!

Keeping abreast of things...

Breast cancer is a major concern under women and rightly so. And, as in all things, education is important in order for us to protect ourselves.

INTERESTING BREAST CANCER FACTS

An estimated 182 800 new cases of malignant breast cancer were diagnosed in 2000.

An estimated amount of 42 2000 women died from breast cancer in 2000.

You stand the best chance of survival through early detection of breast cancer by regular monthly breast self-exams and yearly mammograms after the age of 40.

Ninety-six percent of women who find and treat breast cancer early will be cancer-free after five years.

One in eight women will get breast cancer in her lifetime.

A woman dies every 13 minutes of breast cancer

Breast cancer usually shows upon first in a woman’s mammogram, before it can be felt or any other symptoms show.

Risks for breast cancer include a family history, atypical hyperplasia, delaying pregnancy until after age 30 or never becoming pregnant, early menstruation (before age 12), late menopause (after age 55), current use or use in the last ten years of oral contraceptives, and daily consumption of alcohol.

Seventy-seven percent of breast cancer incidents are women over 50.

Breast cancer is the major fatality factor in women’s cancer between the ages of 15 and 54, and the second cuase of cancer deaths in women 55 to 74.

Over eighty percent of lumps are not malignant but benign, such as fibrocystosis.

Oral contraceptives can cause a slight increase in the risk for breast cancer.

You are never too young to develop breast cancer! You should start self-exams by the age of twenty in order to catch possible breast cancer early enough to be treated.

Breast Cancer Myths

1. Myth: Young women do not get breast cancer.
Fact: Yes, the risk for breast cancer increases as you age, but the fact is that women of all ages are at risk to develop breast cancer.

2. Myth: If there is no incident of breast cancer within your family you do not have to worry about breast cancer.
Fact: The fact is that the majority of women diagnosed with breast cancer do not have a familial history of cancer. Your risk is however significantly higher should your mother, sister or grandmother have or have had breast cancer. See: Breast Cancer Risk Assessment Tool

3. Myth: I don’t have a mutated BRCA1 or BRCA2 gene so I’m sure breast cancer is not in my future.
Fact: Don’t fool yourself! Not having a mutated BRCA1 or BRCA2 gene does not mean you won’t get breast cancer. Actually, the truth is that almost all women (90 to 95 percent) diagnosed with breast cancer have neither a family history nor mutated BRCA1 or BRCA2 gene, according to the American Cancer Society.
See: Understanding the BRCA Gene and Hereditary Breast and Ovarian Cancer

4. Myth: Breast cancer is preventable.
Fact: Although a drug classified as an antiestrogen called, Tamoxifen may decrease breast cancer risk in certain women, the cause of breast cancer remains unknown and is not completely preventable. The real key to surviving breast cancer is early detection and treatment.

5. Myth: Having yearly mammograms will expose me to too much radiation and cancer will occur as a result.
Fact: According to the American College of Radiology, the benefits of annual mammograms far outweigh any risks that may occur because of the minute amount of radiation used during this screening and diagnostic procedure.

6. Myth: I’m not going to breastfeed because breastfeeding would increase my risk of getting breast cancer.
Fact: Just the opposite is true. Breastfeeding may actually decrease the risk of perimenopausal breast cancer.


Self examination:

Here's How:

1. Stand in front of a mirror. Look for any changes such as puckering, changes in size or shape, dimpling, or changes in your skin texture.
2. Look for changes to the shape or texture of your nipples. Gently squeeze each nipple and look for discharge.

3. Repeat these steps with your hands on your hips, over your head, and at your side.
4. Raise your right arm and examine your every part of your left breast. Move in increasingly smaller circles, from the outside in, using the pads of your index and middle fingers.

5. Gently press and feel for lumps or thickenings.

6. Using body cream, if neccessary, continue to circle and gently massage the area outside your breast and under your arm.

7. Repeat with your left arm and right breast.

8. Lay down. Put a pillow under your right shoulder, and your right hand behind your head. Again gently massage and feel your breast for lumps or other changes.
9. Repeat with towel under left shoulder with left hand behind head.

Tips:

1. Menstruating women should do breast self-exam a few days after their periods end. Women who use oral contraceptives should do breast self exam on the first day of a new pill pack.

2. Post-menopausal non-menstruating women should pick a day and do breast self exam on the same day each month. Notify your physician immediately if you notice any changes or lumps.

3. Breast self exam should be a routine part of every woman's life. Talk to your daughters about the importance of breast self exam so it will become a routine part of their lives.

LESBIAN STEREOTYPE MYTHS…

Believed by the ignorant and sometimes, sadly, not so ignorant heteros out there. Some of this might sound absolutely ridiculous and some might actually hit close to home (we’ve associated with a few ourselves).

And yes, we know (as such wonderful creatures ourselves) that us lezzies (and women in general) are ultimately the most individual people out there, but these are some of the myths (and to some of us quasi realities) that are believed out there…

Myth #1

Lesbians wear mens flannel shirts (fuck you very much 90’s). There are few among us who did not go through the 90’s in our torn denims and flannel shirts banging happily along with Nirvana, but now it has turned into a general myth that lesbians wear flannel shirts. Big, unshapely, loose flannel shirts. True? Well… sometimes.

Myth #2

Lesbians were construction worker boots, with various variations of combat boots, hiking boots (and I am sure to the ignorant out there, Doc Martins). Each of which me and my partner has. The funky type, although the new lezzie stereotype are Shane-nising in their Converse or Allstars.

Myth #3

All of us have short nails, so as not too tear our poor partners apart during our non-hetero sex like acts. How sad is that for a function, because some of actually do get dressed up for those theatre nights or gala evenings. And some of us are just pure femme, so if you are a lipstick, please skip this paragraph as some poor souls seem to be very mistaken.

Myth #4

Lesbians cut their hair short. I mean really, have any of you seen any straight girls out there with short hair? This is not excluding the mullet-dyke stereotype. Lately the trend seems to edge towards the bed-head or Mohawks.

Myth #5

To our male-dominated society, this has extended to include any independent women who dares to dye her hair multi-coloured, pierce anything visible (or invisible, as the case may be), or dare to put any ink on her porcelain pure skin. I vote for this one, I love my piercings and tattoos and if that is what it means to be lesbian, then brother, stand aside because I am uber-lezzie.

Myth #6

Lesbians wear wifebeaters (otherwise known as sleeveless vests). Again, thank you L-Word and more specifically, thank you Shane. (Is there any bigger modern stereotype?)

Myth #7

Lezzies wear white Calvin Kleins (which I think is actually a bit more of a trend than we give it credit for).

Myth #8

All lesbians hate men (and Lesbians are all feminists). I am sure that our male friends would be surprised about this (but then again, who says we are not keeping them in our circle for some evil purpose to take over the world).

Myth #9

All homosexuals have “gaydar” and for some reason we should be able to ascertain someones sexual orientation from something as little as a description or a photo. This is not true and I can vouch for the fact that my girlfriend’s gaydar is horrible. If she had to travel according to gaydar she would eternally be lost.

Myth #10

All lesbians love K.D. Lang (I would be hard pressed to name a single song, but who am I to argue with a world of wisdom).

Myth #11

Homosexuality is catching. I am sure there is more than one mommy out there who feels her poor little girl should not be near a lesbian, because just in case our contagious disease is airborne.

Myth #12

Lesbians love sport. Looking at me this is an absolute myth, because you couldn’t get me asleep faster. On the other hand, my girlfriend could prove this myth. This is up to personal judgement and I know I’m probably a minority out there.

There are many myths out there, as is blatantly clear, a lot of them utterly nonsensical. Please feel free to add any we might have missed. After all, lesbians are not supposed to be too smart... ha ha

The Black triangle…

The black triangle (now a widely used lesbian pride symbol), was used by the Nazi’s to mark prisoners as “asocial” in the Nazi concentration camps.

In the Nazi concentration camps every prisoner had to wear a badge (known as the concentration badges) on their jackets, the specific colour of the badges catogorising according to “their kind”. People who were deemed “asocial” had to wear black triangles. The majority of black-triangle prisoners were “mentally retarded” or homeless people. But the minority groups of he prisoners also assigned the black triangle were alcoholics, the unemployed, prostitutes and other such undesirables. Gypsies (or Romas) were also classed with black triangle prisoners, but at some camps were given a brown triangle badge instead.

The lesbian community has over time claimed the black triangle as a symbol of defiance against repression and discrimination and is seen as the equivalent of the gay pink triangle.

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Pink Triangle

The pink triangle was also a Nazi concentration camp badge used for gay men.

Prior to the second World War Paragraph 175, a clause in German law, prohibited homosexual relations (think of the US States who today still have laws against "crimes of nature"). During 1935 when Hitler rose to power he broadened the law to include homosexual kissing, embracing, and even having homosexual fantasies. About 25,000 people were convicted under this law between 1937 and 1939 alone. They were sent to prisons and later concentration camps. Their sentence also included sterilization, most commonly in the form of castration. In 1942, Hitler extended the punishment for homosexuality to death.

Although homosexual prisoners were not shipped en mass to the Aushwitz death camps like so many of the Jewish prisoners, there were still large numbers of gay men executed there along with other non-Jewish prisoners. The real tragedy though occurred after the war. When the Allies defeated the Germany and the Nazi Regime, the political and remaining Jewish prisoners were released from the camps (the regular criminals- murderers, rapists, etc.- were not released for obvious reasons). The homosexual prisoners were never released though because Paragraph 175 remained West German law until 1969. So these innocent men watched as their fellow prisoners were set free, but remained prisoners for 24 more years.

Explain to me... where the term Lesbian came from

The term Lesbian is derived from the beautiful Greek Island of Lesbos (or Lesvos). It was the birth place of the poet Sapho lived in 600 B.C. Sapho was considered a great lyrical poet in her era (and would have been considered an intellectual poet), who was well know for writing romantic poetry to other women.

(To the left is a bust of Sapho)

Sapho was born sometime between 630 BC and 612 BC and thought to have died around 570 BC. The bulk of her poetry, which was well-known and greatly admired throughout antiquity, has been lost (some reports state due to religious fanaticism), but her immense reputation has endured.

Sappho is mainly considered to have been bisexual, as she wrote love poems to both men and women. Her name is also the original of the lesser known term “Sapphic” (which is used to referred to lesbians despite the opinion that she was bisexual rather than strictly homosexual.

Here is an example of Sapho’s poetry, translated by Mary Barnard

I have not had one word from her

Frankly I wish I were dead
When she left, she wept

a great deal; she said to me, "This parting must be
endured, Sappho. I go unwillingly."

I said, "Go, and be happy
but remember (you know
well) whom you leave shackled by love

"If you forget me, think
of our gifts to Aphrodite
and all the loveliness that we shared

"all the violet tiaras,
braided rosebuds, dill and
crocus twined around your young neck

"myrrh poured on your head
and on soft mats girls with
all that they most wished for beside them

"while no voices chanted
choruses without ours,
no woodlot bloomed in spring without song..."

Lesbos is a beautiful Greek island and a popular tourist destination. It is easy to see why.

Interesting fact, Lesbos also contains one of the few known Petrified Forests that exist in the World.

(a photo of the coast of Lesbos)

Heavy Metal..... which piercing makes your boat float?

It is a well known fact that us "lezzies" are free spirited, happy to experiment and easily the most intelligent people in the world. One of the ways I prefer to reflect my rebellion against the normality of life are piercings and tattoos. And there is a huge variety out there. It seems that you can pierce just about anything on your body (or at least attempt to).

I have a tongue piercing and my girlfriend swears it makes a difference when giving oral (apparently in a good way). Having it done was not as painful as I thought it would be (my piercer did it without any local anesthetic), but the after effects were much worse than I expected. Your tongue swells up every morning and when you wake up you can barely move it and it stays swollen until mid-afternoon. But if you are willing to wait it out, it is a wonderful piercing to have. I love mine and I have actually found out that when I remove it I talk with a lisp. Imagine that.



My piercing gone wrong was a hand-web piercing (which I still think is brilliant but Sonia refuses to let me retry).
It is a very difficult piercing to keep hygienic, since you have a habit to touch stuff. Mine was going well until we had to move from our townhouse. The post-move clean out was horrific and that same night my hand swelled to twice its size (I ended up in hospital where they had to cut the ring with pliers to remove it from my hand).

(this is my piercing the day it was done)

You can also pierce your ear just about anywhere. I have pierced my tragus, but there are various other places for your earrings to be paraded. (Warning!! any piercing in cartledge hurts like a bitch and hurts like that very same bitch for a while).

Some more piercings that might tickle your fancy are multiple tongue piercings, anchorings in various body parts (in the below photo on the neck which definitely tickles my fancy) and nipple piercings (which super duper tickles my and my girlfriend's fancies). I decided to leave out the genital piercings, because while this blog is not rated we do not want blogger to kick me off :-)

My woman's new tattoo

I just had to brag. This is my girl's new tattoo which we designed and got done on her birthday. it symbolises our commitment to each other and she was so brave to get it done on her forearm, even though it must have been dead painful...

I put mine on my ankle. It is better than a wedding ring, because now she has a permanent reminder of me (evil grin)